Mews 24 - Donkey Oatey's Animal Nativity

by Jane, Mark, Ethan and Simeon Lewis

Background
Rating
Characters
Staging
Script

Background

This nativity was written for our church Sunday School and specifically designed around those that wanted speaking parts and leaving plenty to do for those who just wanted walk-on parts. Essentially the story is from the animals point-of-view but in the style of a rolling news programme. The scenes are designed to be interspersed with appropriate readings and carols. Any resemblance to characters from Shrek is entirely coincidental!

Rating

Characters

Catrin White - News Anchor (a cat)
Hammy the Hamster - Interviewer
Donkey Oatey - the Christmas donkey
Barnabas, Barnaby and Shaun - sheep
Puss Inn boot - a cat from the Inn
H the Camel in Black
Christina the cow
a cast of thousands - well basically everyone else gets to be the humans in the story so the final manger scene can have Mary, Joseph, shepherds, wise men, angels, stars - as many as you have children for....

Staging

Stage needs to be split into:

1. Mews 24 Studio (desk and microphone)
2. Bethlehem (outside broadcast unit)

Script

Scene 1 – Mews 24

Catrin: Welcome to Mews 24 . I'm Catrin White with all the latest information from Bethlehem today.
Today a giant gorilla has been arrested for playing his drums too loudly in a built up area.
A number of rats have been taken in for questioning following a police raid on rubbish bins outside a local restaurant.
And a squirrel has appeared in court charged with speeding he was caught doing 70 miles per hour in a 30 mile an hour tree.
But our Main story tonight is the news of a baby boy being born in a stable just outside Bethlehem. We have unconfirmed reports that he is lying in a manger. We will be asking has the human housing crisis got out of control? Do people have the right to move into animal’s houses?
Over now to our reporter on the spot Hammy Hamster.
So Hammy what's happening?
Hammy: Well Catrin. I’m standing here on the road to Bethlehem with Donkey Oatey. Good evening Mr Oatey
Oatey: Good evening Hammy
Hammy: So you're a visitor to the city Mr Oatey
Oatey: Yes we arrived yesterday from Nazareth. 70 miles north of here.
Hammy: You walked all the way on your own.
Oatey: No I was with Mary and Joseph.
Hammy: Who are Mary & Joseph?
Oatey: Well Mary is the woman who has had the baby which is lying in the manger.
Hammy:    This is fantastic Catrin. We might be able to get to see the baby.
Oatey: Yes I can take you to see the baby.
Hammy: Excellent we'll be back soon.
Catrin: We'll be back with more on that story after the break.

Scene 2 : A Sheep's Tale

Catrin: Welcome back. Hammy where are you now.
Hammy: I'm with Donkey Oaty and we’ve met some sheep. Good evening...
Oatey: These are my good friends
Hammy: What's your name?
Barnabas: Baaaaarnabas
Barnaby: Baaaaranaby
Hammy: And you are?
Shaun: Shaun!
Hammy: What's been happening to you tonight?
Barnabas: Well we were on the hillside with the shepherds
Barnaby: Then we saw a bright light and heard lovely singing
Shaun: We saw angels!!!
Hammy: Wow! That's very exciting.
Barnabas: Yes it was.
Shaun: No it wasn't it was SCARY!!
Hammy: What did the angels say? And do you know their names?
Barnabas: They didn’t tell us their names
Oatey:   I think you’ll find the large one was called Gabriel!
Barnabas: How do you know that you weren’t there!
Oatey: Well no it's just I've seen him before in Nazareth he visited Mary!
Hammy: Anyway - back to the story, what did they say?
Barnaby: They said "Do not be afraid. We bring you good news of great joy. A baby has been born in Bethlehem. Who will be the Saviour of the World!"
Barnabas: Then they said: "Peace on Earth and goodwill to all men"
Shaun: And animals!!
Hammy: That's amazing angels here in Bethlehem. Back to you in the studio Catrin.
Catrin: Thanks Hammy. We'll back after this.

Scene 3 - Camel in Black

Catrin: Hammy the Hamster our reporter has tracked down a secret agent from the Far East and is with him now. Hammy can you hear me?
Hammy: Yes I can. I am with the undercover agent now. For security reasons he can only be identified as The Camel in Black.
H: Good Evening. You can call me H if that helps.
Hammy: Well H can you tell us why you are here in Bethlehem.
H: Not really other than it is a secret mission.
Hammy: Are you working as an agent from another country?
H: I can't comment on that.
Hammy: Are there more undercover agents in Jerusalem?
H: I really can't say.
Hammy: So if I said that there were 3 of you would that be true?
H: I cannot confirm how many of us there are. Stop asking me all these questions.
Hammy: Don’t take the hump, I'm an interviewer I'm only doing my job.
OK so does this have something to do with the star?
H: How do you know that? That is classified information on a strictly need to know basis.
Hammy: I do need to know and anyway Donkey Oaty told me.
Oatey: That’s right I did. I heard you were following the star and that the humans with you were looking for a baby.
H: Where did you get all this information?
Oatey: From a mouse who lives at Herod’s palace. He was nibbling on some cheese in the throne room when you and your travelling companions turned up.
H: Well this is very worrying, Going back to the palace now maybe dangerous.
Hammy: Sorry - if I can just finish my interview. What does the star have to do with the baby?
H: Well we believe the star means this baby is someone very, very special indeed – a great and powerful king. But we do not understand why we have found him here in a stable and not in the palace – it seems he is working undercover too.
Hammy: Thank you H. Back to you in the studio Catrin.
Catrin: Thanks Hammy. This gets more and more interesting by the minute. Just a reminder then – our breaking news is the birth of a very special baby king who is currently occupying one of our very own mangers. You heard here first on Mews 24. More on that story after this. Miaow.

Scene 4 - Puss Inn Boots

Catrin: We’re going over live to Hammy the Hamster who’s at the Inn now where the baby has been born. Hammy have you seen the baby yet?
Oatey: Hi Catrin it's Donkey Oatey here.
Catrin: Where’s Hammy?
Oatey: He's just finishing his lunch but his cheeks are stuffed and he can't talk properly.
[Hammy sticks out his cheeks and mumbles something.]
Catrin: Oh what do we do then?
Oatey: Well I’ve just met the cat who lives at the Inn so I could talk to him.
Catrin: OK
Oatey: So what's new pussycat?
Puss: Puss in Boots at your service!
Oatey: OK so what can you tell us about the baby.
Puss: Well yesterday was like a mad house with this census the humans are doing, people coming, people going. They forgot to feed me and so I went to the stable for a nice sleep and to see if I could find someone to eat.
Oatey: What happened then?
Puss: Well I snuggled up in the manger after a lovely supper of gerbil & rocket salad!
Hammy: Wa-ahhhh! (hides behind Oatey)
Oatey: Could you not talk about that? - you're making Hammy nervous.
Puss: My apologies. So I was in the manger having a catnap after my catnip and suddenly the door opens and in comes my mistress followed by a man in a cloak, a woman with an enormous tummy and a small, skinny, dirty, smelly, grey donkey.
Oatey: That would be me.
Puss: Oh was it? My apologies Mr Oatey it was dark and you just did not look so good yesterday! I tried to go back to sleep. I thought they would leave but no they put all the animals away in the stalls at the back. They moved the hay around, making noise and the woman with the big tummy sat down. She did not look like she was going anywhere!!
Oatey: Tell us what happened next.
Puss: Well then the woman said, "it is time, the baby is coming". My mistress said they could put the baby in the manger.
Oatey: What did you do?
Puss: Cats – we do not like babies. I decided not to hang around and so I went back to the house and curled up by the fire and fell asleep.
Oatey: So you didn’t see anything.
Puss: No. I would have stayed if I had known who the baby was! I regret very much that I missed one of the most important events in history. I am so ashamed.
Oatey: So you believe that this baby is someone special too?
Puss: Oh yes – I heard them say – this baby is God's son!
Oatey: Really Wow. Thank you Mr Boots. What a scoop! Back to you in the studio Catrin.
Catrin: Thanks Oatey. Coming up next an exclusive interview with the owner of the manger. Miaow.

Scene 5 - Mooving Pictures

Catrin: We return to our breaking news about a human baby living in animal accommodation. Now over to Hammy who is at the stable now.
Hammy: Hello Catrin I am here at the stable with Christina the Cow... [turns to Christina] Hello Christina.
Christina: Hello Hammy.
Hammy: Apparently it is your manger that the baby is lying in.
Christina: Yes that's right.
Hammy: How does that feel?
Christina: I'm honoured!
Hammy: You're….what? Aren’t you upset about your manger being taken over by a baby?
Christina: No - not at all!
Hammy: Not even a little teensie bit?
Christina: Oh No.
Hammy: Why ever not?
Christina: Well if God gave up everything to come and see you wouldn't you be happy to give up something for him?
Hammy: Err. I hadn't really thought about it like that! So you believe this baby is God’s son too?
Christina: Well the angels were a bit of a giveaway.
Hammy: Do you think we could you know, go and see for ourselves?
Oatey: Of course Hammy. You really need to see him for yourself, come on.

[Hammy & Oatey move off stage. All other children get on stage to create stable/nativity tableau. Oatey & Hammy re-enter.]

Oatey: See Hammy I told you.
Hammy: Wow! Catrin are you getting these pictures.
Catrin: Yes – we can see Hammy. Well everyone this is incredible.
A story of humans occupying animal homes has uncovered an amazing story about God’s son coming here as a baby. Why on earth would he come this way? Well you can be sure that we’ll find out here on Mews 24. Miaow.

[Cue 'Away in a Manger']